Hey there,
my lovely readers,
hope these words are finding you
well and at peace.
Let’s just get this out there:
I don’t understand men.
I’ve tried.
I'm trying.
I’ve poured myself into every relationship,
from romantic ones
to my relationships with my fathers.
And yet,
here I am,
still scratching my head.
Every man I’ve loved
or tried to love
has always
doubted one thing
—that I would actually leave.
They never really believed
I would go.
No matter how many times
I said how
I was getting tired,
or
how clearly
I explained what I needed.
The Squeaky Wheel Theory
You know the saying,
“The squeaky wheel gets the oil?”
Well,
I think
that’s how it works
with men and women too.
The woman
who makes the biggest fuss,
who demands attention,
or just plain has the most demands,
somehow ends up being the one who gets
exactly what she wants.
WHICH I AIN'T KNOCKING!!!✊🏾
Meanwhile,
the woman who quietly asks for a call,
a walk,
a text,
or just a simple effort
is left waiting,
like a tire that rolls without a sound until it blows out on the freeway.
Only then does someone notice.
It’s like
I was that quiet tire all along
—never squeaking,
until I reached a breaking point.
And by then,
it’s just “time for a new tire."
The Cost of Squeaking
Now,
don’t get me wrong.
I can fuss,
and I know men fuss in their own ways too.
But what I’ve realized is this:
the energy
it takes to keep squeaking,
to keep making noise just to be seen,
could be spent
on things that truly bring me joy and fulfillment.
That energy
could go into loving my children,
bettering myself,
writing,
learning new things,
and
nurturing my dreams.
The truth is,
I shouldn’t have to “squeak” to be loved,
and neither should you.
Constantly
asking for the bare minimum
takes away from other,
more meaningful
parts of life.
Relationships
shouldn’t be a test
of how loud we can get to be noticed.
Love should flow naturally,
with both people investing
and caring
without
being begged to do so.
Why I’m Single
So,
I guess this post is about why I’m single.
I’m not here to complain.
I’m here to say that
I’m choosing peace over noise.
I’m choosing
to wait
until I find someone
who sees me,
who listens,
who values the quiet love I bring,
instead
of expecting
me to go out of my way
to demand attention.
And one day,
I truly believe
I’ll find someone
who wants that same peaceful,
quiet kind of love.
But for now?
I’m perfectly content
(not always so perfectly 🤷🏾♀️)
keeping my heart open
but reserved
for the right person.
I’ll keep “interviewing,”
so to speak,
until I meet the one
who’s qualified
to share my most intimate space
and time.
I’m squeaking 💯